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The Origins of the Great Sloth Hawk

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  • The Origins of the Great Sloth Hawk

    Watcheth the video first.
    http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=i0zrah5JEBM
    The great sloth hawk remembereth his origins well. The harpy consumed the sloth, but did not kill him. The sloth, great in years and wisdom, remained alive in the belly of the eagle for several weeks, waging a mental war with the mind of the youthful raptor. The two engaged in this profound battle of wits for what seemed like an eternity. The hawk was too young and spry to be captured by the sloth, yet the sloth too wise and experienced to be bested by the harpy. As nightfall of the 40th day of their struggle approached, they realized that if this continued, it would mean the death of them both. It was at this moment that a dangerous pact was sealed, and in a beautiful transformation, their consciousness were merged, and they metamorphosed into the great and brilliant sloth hawk, possessing the calculated and deliberate wisdom of the sloth, and the quick and deadly cunning of the eagle. With this infinite wisdom and knowledge of all things, the great sloth hawk accomplished the act of creating mock trial, using it to spread the good news of his existence to all his followers. Praised be the great sloth hawk.

  • #2
    I'm sorry dude but this royalty/deity alter-ego idea was done years ago by no fewer than three or four different Prog plagiarizers. It wasn't that entertaining then, neither.

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    • #3
      The Origins of the Great Sloth Hawk

      The great sloth hawk declareth that if you are going to be a hard ass and taketh yourself too seriously, you should at least use proper grammar. "Wasn't funny then, neither"? The great sloth hawk laugheth out loud at your double negative. Haha. Ha. Ha.

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      • #4
        I liked this "thing" but only because the photoshopped Facebook profile picture made to create the image of a "sloth hawk" was hilarious.
        Elliott A. - Macalester College 2015
        "Fake it 'til you make it."

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        • #5
          The Origins of the Great Sloth Hawk

          Tis not photoshopped. The great sloth hawk is alive and real, and he doth create and rule mock trial. He goes with you to Orlando.

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